It was a beautiful moment for me when I discovered my worth. It was a moment to cherish and remember because it was the beginning of something new. It was the beginning of living as if I have worth— because I do.
Where was this worth hiding? It wasn’t in my lackluster achievements, and it certainly wasn’t in my bank account. It wasn’t in my social circle, nor in my far-from-supermodel appearance.
My worth was me. I am my worth. My existence is my worth. The unique combination of bits and pieces that makes me the only version of me in the world. That is my worth.
And guess what? It’s your worth, too. Your worth is being who you are.
And changing and growing, too. Your worth isn’t a fixed combination of parts, like gears in a clock. Your worth is fluid, like seashells left on the shore. The seashells change with each tide, but your worth remains the same.
Your worth can never grow or fade, increase or decrease, come or go. It’s always in you because it is you. True, you can cover and hide your worth, stuff it down and wear a mask to keep it hidden, but it’s still there. You’re still there. Ready to come out and shine.
The Importance of Self-Worth
In order to live your most beautiful and fulfilling life, you need to begin in a place of worth. You need to believe that you matter. You need to know that you make a difference— a beautiful, positive difference— in the world. You need to know that your life has worth.
If you don’t believe you have worth, then you won’t find worth. Your ideas and dreams won’t have worth. Your body won’t be worth taking care of. You won’t be worth defending and protecting. You won’t be worth treating with love and kindness.
If you don’t see your worth, then you don’t believe you deserve good things. So you don’t go after them. You don’t demand them. You don’t allow them.
If you don’t believe in your worth, then you’re missing out. Missing out on love and belonging. Missing out on making your dreams come true. Missing out on fun and fulfillment. You don’t give yourself these things when you don’t believe you’re deserving.
The Source of Self-Worth
So where does worth come from? It helps to look at where it does not come from first.
Worth does not come from:
- Your appearance
- Your financial assets
- Your popularity or network
- Your profession
- Your achievements
- Your social media following
- Your skills and talents
- Your relationship status
- Your preferences, passions, and pastimes
- The opinion of others
None of these things affect or change your worth. Your worth is not determined by anyone or anything. Even if you believe you are unworthy, you are still worthy!
You are always, always, always worthy.
The only thing about your worth that can be affected is your perception of it. If you believe that you are unworthy, then you will think and act as if you are unworthy, and that will create an unworthy life (in other words, a life you don’t deserve). If you believe that you are worthy and valuable, then you will think and act from a place of worth, and that will create an entirely different life (in other words, a life that reflects your worth).
You build your self-worth by building your perception of it.
4 Steps to Build Your Self-Worth
1// Increase self-awareness.
You need to know who you are and what you’re about before you can see that you’re a worthy human being. (While this is different for everyone, it’s exactly this unique set of traits that makes you YOU and makes you worthy.)
The Inner Journey 10-Day Challenge increases your self-awareness in ten significant areas. It’s a free resource that helps you identify your values, discover your dreams, uncover your strengths, and much more. This is a great foundation for knowing and understanding yourself!
2// Increase self-acceptance.
Once you know who you are, you can begin accepting yourself. Limitless Love: One Week of Wonderful You is a free PDF that includes practices for accepting and forgiving yourself (a necessary step to complete acceptance). It also contains several practices that help with the next step!
Boost your self-acceptance with these affirmations:
- Even though I make mistakes, I deeply and completely accept myself.
- I fully accept every part of myself, including my flaws, fears, and failures.
- I did not know then what I know now, and I forgive myself for past choices.
3// Increase self-love.
After you accept yourself, you can work toward loving yourself. Some parts of yourself (like your values and strengths) may be easier to love than others (like your body size and tendency to drop something when everyone else is still sleeping— or maybe that’s just me).
Grow your self-love by growing those tender loving pathways in your brain. Neural pathways grow through repetition, so the more you treat yourself with love, the stronger and more automatic the self-love becomes!
Start loving yourself more by treating yourself with love. And you can treat yourself with love by following 10 Ways to Practice Self-Love and Be Your Own Best Friend.
Boost your self-love with these affirmations:
- Even though I’m far from perfect, I deeply and completely love myself.
- I am an irreplaceable, unrepeatable miracle, and I love myself.
- There are so many things about me to love.
4// Recognize your worth.
Each step builds upon the previous step. Awareness leads to acceptance leads to love leads to worth. When this happens, you no longer need to rely on accomplishments, the opinions of others, or any other external factors to see your worth (because they don’t affect your worth, anyway). Your worth comes from within, and it’s always there.
Maintain your self-worth by maintaining your self-awareness, self-acceptance, and self-love. Continuing learning about yourself, forgiving yourself, and treating yourself with love. Continue these practices, and continue seeing your worth. Remember, your worth doesn’t change, only your perception of it.
Whenever you hear a critical inner voice decreasing your worth, you now have tons of ammunition to prove otherwise. No matter what you do or do not do, you are still worthy. That doesn’t change.
Hey there, fellow free spirit!
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